You know your not in a good place when your cat jumps off your bed and you find yourself shouting 'fine, go then , who needs you?' the cat being a cat had no idea I was talking to her and ran of to find some food or do something else only cats care about like drilling behind couches. But things aren't great I find myself now being unemployed for 6 months and experience shows that life can easily get very depressing at this stage. Money is always an issue but more so when people want you to visit and there are party's to attend. Which seems to mostly happen around the summer. Of course the irony being if I was working I probably wouldn't be able to attend such gatherings as I would be busy. So whats the answer? Get a job is a good answer and its a practical answer but this isn't like when I was 17 and didn't care I have genuinely been trying. As a man with out any real responsibilities in life I can almost happily work for minimum wage with out any real issue, well no real issue if I'm working full time. But I have found nothing so recently I decided just find work, any work with some exceptions but call me old fashion cleaning jobs are for woman and illegal immigrants. Little joke there for you. So with no job offers I decided that fuck it even part time work will do. Still no fucking luck.
Boredom can easily be fixed, well temporarily any way. You can fix it for 90 minuets with a film or 3 hours or so having a gaming session. But this is always only temporarily. Soon you have to deal with your mundane life again. I still hate day time T.V. almost as much as I hate prime time T.V. the only joy I get is watching a few American shows online and sadly most of the good ones are either not going to be shown any more or they are coming to the end of there season. I guess my point is T.V. sucks.
Life isn't all grim though I recently had the joy of my niece and sister visiting for a couple of days. Toddlers are great, as long as your not the parent that is. They can bring hours of entertainment to your life simply by making odd noises and trying to have baby conversations with you. By baby conversation I mean a string of random noises pieced together with whole words. Plus looking after kids is tiring, in the future gyms will still have all of the equipment in them but you will be lent a child upon entry and it will be your job to play with said child while keeping it safe from all the weights and running machines and so on. I promise you you'll be more tired then if you spent the day simply on the running machine, plus it will be a lot more entertaining.
Friday 28 May 2010
Monday 24 May 2010
The Hulk doesn't blog he just breaks stuff
But alas I am not the Hulk, that fight with the military proved that. No super powers for me, when things piss me off I can only write them down for others to read and take fake interest in and that makes me the crappiest super hero of them all, even worse then booster gold (that's in there for hardcore comic lovers and I know nobody reading this has the faintest idea who that is).
So whats been pissing me off, for starters the England flag. Its so dull I mean really it looks like it was designed by a four year old that had a small red pen and a bit of paper. Where is the imagination? Our saint thought a dragon I mean personally I think it would be better if the dragon was are saint. Imagine how cool the flag would be then. Another issue I have is how tacky it looks hanging out of house windows, yes fine lets pubs display it as much as they want. But we pride ourselves above all things on not being American so let them keep there pointless views on patriotism and we can go out for a curry. For the record this is not me telling you that you cant have a flag, NOBODY IS TELLING YOU THIS, this is me giving you my opinion on them. Nobody has said you cant do this, a couple of right wing papers reported that some pub chains wont be as it attracts mindless thugs in to their establishments. But in fairness I think the thugs where there anyway and they just wanted to beat some people up.
I made a joke the other day to a friend it goes something like this. Woman can say that we don't understand the pain they go through while having a baby this of course is untrue for any man that has been forced to watch Sex in the City movie. Jesus that was some pain full 2 hours, the next Saw films will be based around forcing men to sit through that film twice or choosing to rip out there eyes and shove needles in to there ears. It wasn't just that it was a bad film, that would be to simple. O no it also had to be pointless, little more then an extended version of the TV series. So why didn't they just make a T.V. movie? Some of you are saying that's the point, they just gave the audience more of what they wanted. Well FUCK YOU, If you have that big a budget have the girls fighting of an alien invasion using the powers of prada. They can get there tits out every now and again just for kicks and instantly with have a much better film. This anger comes from the up coming release of Sex and the City 2. This time they are on holiday, sadly not in some really hostile Muslim country which ends with each of the girls being stoned to death.
The next biggest gripe on my list is my computer mouse, yeah you die, you die and you go to hell. It seemed so cool at the time as it uses lasers. But now its nothing but an issue the only surface I can use it on that doesn't make it act like someone with turrets is skin, I constantly find myself using my hand or leg, stupid mouse. But at least I have resolved this issue by ordering a new one. One out of three issues resolved, I class that as a result.
So whats been pissing me off, for starters the England flag. Its so dull I mean really it looks like it was designed by a four year old that had a small red pen and a bit of paper. Where is the imagination? Our saint thought a dragon I mean personally I think it would be better if the dragon was are saint. Imagine how cool the flag would be then. Another issue I have is how tacky it looks hanging out of house windows, yes fine lets pubs display it as much as they want. But we pride ourselves above all things on not being American so let them keep there pointless views on patriotism and we can go out for a curry. For the record this is not me telling you that you cant have a flag, NOBODY IS TELLING YOU THIS, this is me giving you my opinion on them. Nobody has said you cant do this, a couple of right wing papers reported that some pub chains wont be as it attracts mindless thugs in to their establishments. But in fairness I think the thugs where there anyway and they just wanted to beat some people up.
I made a joke the other day to a friend it goes something like this. Woman can say that we don't understand the pain they go through while having a baby this of course is untrue for any man that has been forced to watch Sex in the City movie. Jesus that was some pain full 2 hours, the next Saw films will be based around forcing men to sit through that film twice or choosing to rip out there eyes and shove needles in to there ears. It wasn't just that it was a bad film, that would be to simple. O no it also had to be pointless, little more then an extended version of the TV series. So why didn't they just make a T.V. movie? Some of you are saying that's the point, they just gave the audience more of what they wanted. Well FUCK YOU, If you have that big a budget have the girls fighting of an alien invasion using the powers of prada. They can get there tits out every now and again just for kicks and instantly with have a much better film. This anger comes from the up coming release of Sex and the City 2. This time they are on holiday, sadly not in some really hostile Muslim country which ends with each of the girls being stoned to death.
The next biggest gripe on my list is my computer mouse, yeah you die, you die and you go to hell. It seemed so cool at the time as it uses lasers. But now its nothing but an issue the only surface I can use it on that doesn't make it act like someone with turrets is skin, I constantly find myself using my hand or leg, stupid mouse. But at least I have resolved this issue by ordering a new one. One out of three issues resolved, I class that as a result.
Saturday 22 May 2010
JESUS SAVES you 13% APR
Summer is here, finally. I know this for a fact as 2 nights ago I couldn't get to sleep because of the fucking humidity. I'm one of those people that likes to be covered up when I sleep so its a bit inconvenient during these hot nights. But fuck it summer is here, o yeah the season of barbeque's, holidays, lots of alchol and woman wearing very little. You got to love summer unless your pale skinned, broke, ugly or working loads. Summer has its ups and its downs that's for sure.
We also have the world cup, this is both blessing and curse for all those who will be watching. Instant curse if your from one of those backwards countries that didn't qualify as you get to listen to the rest of us going on and on about it. Instant curse if your a woman or gay and simply looking at all the pretty men isn't enough for you. Instant curse if you like me find the world cup the only time to get passionate about football then you get your heart broken when England lose on penalties. Who knows maybe this year will be our year its not very likely but we will see. I kind of hope it wont be as to be fair England have so little to celebrate that we keep going on and on about any small victory we have ever had. Don't get me wrong we aren't half as bad as Scotland but we are pretty bad. Yes we won world war 2 with no help from any other country but that was 500 years ago and we still feel OK about hanging on to all racist attitudes attached to that war. I would love an achievement that England could have in which we made a real difference to everyone on the planet, something that could be talked about for 1000 years not just that we invented the pot noodle.
Summer time is also the time for the summer blockbuster. A time of year when we wrap turds up with tin foil and declare it to be platinum. I will probably watch a few real stinkers this year but because it will be loud and flashy I'll come away thinking I've seen a master piece. You are probably worse then me when it comes to this with a few exceptions. I know this as a lot of you come away from watching a real bit of crap and state how it was the best film you have ever seen. I don't like to give ratings in reviews, I think its more important to try and get appoint how you felt about something in other ways but the rating system works and its easy for most people to understand. So here is my review of Iron Man 2, I give it 3.5 out of 5 for the record if I had to review Iron man 1 I would give it the exact same score, here's why. Its not the same movie, but there is a part of me that feel its is, maybe because it kicks of just after Iron Man 1 but more so because I felt there was no real growth in any of the characters. Take the Lord of The Rings films, most critics and movie goers will class these films as modern classics and rightly so. They are huge big budget movies with impressive acting and great set pieces. They where wonderfully made with real love and attention. Plus there was real character growth, you could see the main players change from film to film. Interesting side note more then in the books. Anyway back to Iron Man 2 I enjoyed it , don't get me wrong it was fun and enjoyable, it looked great and had some real laugh out loud moments, sadly the biggest laugh out loud moment for me was waiting till the end of the credits to catch a look at Thor, the waiting was fucking pointless I learnt nothing. Anyway Iron Man 2 good I'll probably end up owning it and I'll say now if you have a couple of hours free go check it out you will probably have, it is not the best film ever made though.
I went on a bit longer then I planned with that section sorry. Anyway I love film or should that be I love lovefilm? Its an online film and game rental services for those of you not in the know and it rocks. For £14.99 a month I can have 2 disks at any time for as long as I want them. This really comes in handy when it comes to games and has saved me at least 3 times as much as the cost of membership with just the games rentals. In fairness I can complete a game in a weekend, so if i brought them that's over £30 a pop just for that if I rented from Blockbuster that's about £6 a week which is not bad. But I recently rented Final Fantasy 13 and had that game for close to a month, money saved :) .
I don't just get games I also get films, lots of films. I'm currently unemployed so killing time is important to me and films help a lot. Especially when it comes to catching up on all those films I don't want to own but do want to see. This brings me to a documentary called Religulous here is the description from the love film site
This documentary follows political humorist and author Bill Maher as he travels around the globe interviewing people about God and religion. Known for his analytical skills, wit and commitment to never pulling a punch, Maher brings his characteristic honesty to an unusual spiritual journey.
This film didn't tell me anything new about my views on religion it shocked me a little but for the most part I already knew that religion on the whole is fucking nuts. What shocked me the most was the views from prominent Catholic Priests they weren't as backwards thinking as I thought. Bill Maher talked to some real fruit loops, I'm talking about people so fucking stupid they built a theme park showing dinosaurs and man playing together. When Bill went to the Vatican to meet there head of astronomy he said that the very notion of man and dinosaur being together was insane, and that the planet was millions of years old not just 5000 as some fruit loops believe. he knows this because of the use of science. Bill later spoke to another Priest who happily stated that the idea of following the bible to the letter was stupid and that there are good messages to take from the bible (like there are from pretty much all religions) but don't get suckered in to all the over crap. That's what I like about some true believers the guys that's do really exist but they aren't judgemental they do seem genuinely full of love. There isn't many of them and for every one of these true believers there are a million idiots with bombs strapped to them selves or who insist that evolution is a trick from the devil. Do check out this documentary, like I said most of it didn't shock me, I know that most religion is so crazy and backwards it has no place in our lives, but every now and again i found out something new that really out a smile on my face and made me feel there was still hope left for us all.
Doing more research I have found this film online on YouTube its all there go watch
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5HKHaClUCw4
We also have the world cup, this is both blessing and curse for all those who will be watching. Instant curse if your from one of those backwards countries that didn't qualify as you get to listen to the rest of us going on and on about it. Instant curse if your a woman or gay and simply looking at all the pretty men isn't enough for you. Instant curse if you like me find the world cup the only time to get passionate about football then you get your heart broken when England lose on penalties. Who knows maybe this year will be our year its not very likely but we will see. I kind of hope it wont be as to be fair England have so little to celebrate that we keep going on and on about any small victory we have ever had. Don't get me wrong we aren't half as bad as Scotland but we are pretty bad. Yes we won world war 2 with no help from any other country but that was 500 years ago and we still feel OK about hanging on to all racist attitudes attached to that war. I would love an achievement that England could have in which we made a real difference to everyone on the planet, something that could be talked about for 1000 years not just that we invented the pot noodle.
Summer time is also the time for the summer blockbuster. A time of year when we wrap turds up with tin foil and declare it to be platinum. I will probably watch a few real stinkers this year but because it will be loud and flashy I'll come away thinking I've seen a master piece. You are probably worse then me when it comes to this with a few exceptions. I know this as a lot of you come away from watching a real bit of crap and state how it was the best film you have ever seen. I don't like to give ratings in reviews, I think its more important to try and get appoint how you felt about something in other ways but the rating system works and its easy for most people to understand. So here is my review of Iron Man 2, I give it 3.5 out of 5 for the record if I had to review Iron man 1 I would give it the exact same score, here's why. Its not the same movie, but there is a part of me that feel its is, maybe because it kicks of just after Iron Man 1 but more so because I felt there was no real growth in any of the characters. Take the Lord of The Rings films, most critics and movie goers will class these films as modern classics and rightly so. They are huge big budget movies with impressive acting and great set pieces. They where wonderfully made with real love and attention. Plus there was real character growth, you could see the main players change from film to film. Interesting side note more then in the books. Anyway back to Iron Man 2 I enjoyed it , don't get me wrong it was fun and enjoyable, it looked great and had some real laugh out loud moments, sadly the biggest laugh out loud moment for me was waiting till the end of the credits to catch a look at Thor, the waiting was fucking pointless I learnt nothing. Anyway Iron Man 2 good I'll probably end up owning it and I'll say now if you have a couple of hours free go check it out you will probably have, it is not the best film ever made though.
I went on a bit longer then I planned with that section sorry. Anyway I love film or should that be I love lovefilm? Its an online film and game rental services for those of you not in the know and it rocks. For £14.99 a month I can have 2 disks at any time for as long as I want them. This really comes in handy when it comes to games and has saved me at least 3 times as much as the cost of membership with just the games rentals. In fairness I can complete a game in a weekend, so if i brought them that's over £30 a pop just for that if I rented from Blockbuster that's about £6 a week which is not bad. But I recently rented Final Fantasy 13 and had that game for close to a month, money saved :) .
I don't just get games I also get films, lots of films. I'm currently unemployed so killing time is important to me and films help a lot. Especially when it comes to catching up on all those films I don't want to own but do want to see. This brings me to a documentary called Religulous here is the description from the love film site
This documentary follows political humorist and author Bill Maher as he travels around the globe interviewing people about God and religion. Known for his analytical skills, wit and commitment to never pulling a punch, Maher brings his characteristic honesty to an unusual spiritual journey.
This film didn't tell me anything new about my views on religion it shocked me a little but for the most part I already knew that religion on the whole is fucking nuts. What shocked me the most was the views from prominent Catholic Priests they weren't as backwards thinking as I thought. Bill Maher talked to some real fruit loops, I'm talking about people so fucking stupid they built a theme park showing dinosaurs and man playing together. When Bill went to the Vatican to meet there head of astronomy he said that the very notion of man and dinosaur being together was insane, and that the planet was millions of years old not just 5000 as some fruit loops believe. he knows this because of the use of science. Bill later spoke to another Priest who happily stated that the idea of following the bible to the letter was stupid and that there are good messages to take from the bible (like there are from pretty much all religions) but don't get suckered in to all the over crap. That's what I like about some true believers the guys that's do really exist but they aren't judgemental they do seem genuinely full of love. There isn't many of them and for every one of these true believers there are a million idiots with bombs strapped to them selves or who insist that evolution is a trick from the devil. Do check out this documentary, like I said most of it didn't shock me, I know that most religion is so crazy and backwards it has no place in our lives, but every now and again i found out something new that really out a smile on my face and made me feel there was still hope left for us all.
Doing more research I have found this film online on YouTube its all there go watch
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5HKHaClUCw4
Saturday 15 May 2010
Kitty Cat Conundrums
Hi mum, how was Spain? Good good and by the way Arri has lost one of his legs. This is how a conversation will start when I see my mum for the first time in a week. She has been teaching idiot Spaniards how to speak English. I class then as idiots as we all know that the English language is the most practical and easy language to learn in the world, this is because it forms naturally in the brain. Think about it almost all over languages use our letters, they just mumble them up and pronounce them differently (thank you Al Murray for that joke).
So how did my beautiful cat come to lose one of his legs, the truth is we will probably never know. All I can tell you is what I know.I strongly suggest that for dramatic affect you picture me as a 7 year old girl, this way you'll have more sympathy and wont class me as a wuss for getting very emotional about this event. So our story begins on Wednesday the 12th of may I was busy in my room (watching T.V. and pissing about on the Internet pretty much as busy as an unemployed person can be really) when my dad called me in to his study. He told me that something was very wrong with our cat Arri. I checked on the cat to see blood all over him and covering the couch he was sitting on, at this time I didn't know if it was his blood or something else but it quickly became apparent it was his. His front left leg had almost been destroyed completely almost all the fur had been ripped off and the bones which where visible seems broken and mangled. It was not a pleasant site. Immediately we jumped in to action I searched for a cage to put him in while my dad contacted the vets and then phoned my nan, my nan being the only member of the Budworth clan with any common sense when it comes to money is the person we most rely on in times of upcoming financial difficulties, thank you so much nan. While we where both out of the room Arri had hobbled upstairs, he wasn't exactly difficult to find and the trail of blood leading to him reminded me of about 100 action movie cliches, but it also reminded me of gravity of the situation. I manged to find him a cage and put down a cushion for him to sit on and we where off.
First stop pick up my nan, like i said she is our rock in financial issues and anyone that's ever had an animal emergency can tell you vets are not cheap. The journey picking her up was easy enough and that cat although obviously miserable was moving around. Then off to the vet, I sat in the back of the car the whole journey keeping an eye on Arri but we had to make our way to Sevenoaks, not a long journey by any means but time drags in these kinds of situations and a minuet feels like an hour. I cant claim to know anything about blood loss traumas but if T.V. and films have taught me anything its that you don't let something that's lost a lot of blood sleep. This of course might be the completely wrong thing to do in this case but I don't know that so every time I see his eyes close and his breathing slow down i would call his name out loud or knock the cage to keep him alert, it seems to work as he manages to stay awake for the whole journey. We pull up to the vets I jump out grabbing the cat cage and storm in to the vets, the receptionist knows exactly who we are and why where there and leads us to what I can only guess is emergency waiting room.
Like I wrote earlier it helps if you imagine me to be a 7 year old girl and all this time I have been fighting back the tears as I'm very much under the impression this cat will die in my arms. All I can think of are all the wonder full characteristics this cat has and it was killing me to think this was his last day on the planet. I f ever there was cat that lived for being stroked it was Arri, it was his purpose in life to find things that could and would stroke him, rubbing himself against any and all objects, on top of that he loved sleeping, but not like any cat I have ever known. He loved sleeping in some of the weirdest positions known to man, I can safely say that even the most talented practitioner of yoga could not recreate these moves, and he did them in his sleep. The vet finds us a few minuets later and leads us in to an assessment room. She is a pro quickly getting him out of the cage and assessing the injury to the leg, but these aren't her main concerns. The real issue maybe internal, especially if these injury's have been caused by a car.
Were informed that what other problems there maybe the cat will lose his leg, this cant be helped the damage is to bad. I suspected as much so this wasn't to much of a shock. Just as the doctor was about to leave I ask 'do you think my cat will make it?' She didn't want to give a straight answer, she knew that if there was to much internal damage there wasn't anything that could be done so she just reassured me and told me that she hoped so.
We left Arri cat with them to be put on a drip and given some pain meds, they would need to observe him over night then remove the leg the following day. We went home to clean up the blood and wait to hear what fate would become my cat. It was a terrible night, I hardly slept and felt awful throughout the night. I did text a friend or two seeking comfort but it was late and to be honest I doubt anything said would have cheered me up. So I went back to waiting.
As mourning came around we received a call of good news, there where no other injury's and the leg had been removed . On top of that they where happy with his progress and we would be getting him back soon. WHOOP WHOOP :)
My dad picked him up from the vets late Friday evening while he was there he was told that Arri had won an award for bravery, apparently he was good and calm the whole time he was there, then again I suppose its easy to be calm when drugged up on morphine, but hey who is complaining. So he is back with us now, he is trying to adjust to the lack of a limb, but cats adapt quickly and he is already moving about and sleeping in odd positions. I haven't been able to say anything on facebook or right this before as we didn't want my mum finding out while she was away on holiday, for obvious reasons we didn't feel it right to risk it.
I don't expect anyone to care about this to much, I mean Jesus Christ how many of you shed a tear about that recent plane crash that killed over a 100 people. Don't worry I'm not calling your heartless its just we've all desensitised to this type of tradegy. But if any of you have recently come in to a large sum of cash and want to help with the vet bills please let me know. Did I mention my cat can say 'i love you' on demand?
So how did my beautiful cat come to lose one of his legs, the truth is we will probably never know. All I can tell you is what I know.I strongly suggest that for dramatic affect you picture me as a 7 year old girl, this way you'll have more sympathy and wont class me as a wuss for getting very emotional about this event. So our story begins on Wednesday the 12th of may I was busy in my room (watching T.V. and pissing about on the Internet pretty much as busy as an unemployed person can be really) when my dad called me in to his study. He told me that something was very wrong with our cat Arri. I checked on the cat to see blood all over him and covering the couch he was sitting on, at this time I didn't know if it was his blood or something else but it quickly became apparent it was his. His front left leg had almost been destroyed completely almost all the fur had been ripped off and the bones which where visible seems broken and mangled. It was not a pleasant site. Immediately we jumped in to action I searched for a cage to put him in while my dad contacted the vets and then phoned my nan, my nan being the only member of the Budworth clan with any common sense when it comes to money is the person we most rely on in times of upcoming financial difficulties, thank you so much nan. While we where both out of the room Arri had hobbled upstairs, he wasn't exactly difficult to find and the trail of blood leading to him reminded me of about 100 action movie cliches, but it also reminded me of gravity of the situation. I manged to find him a cage and put down a cushion for him to sit on and we where off.
First stop pick up my nan, like i said she is our rock in financial issues and anyone that's ever had an animal emergency can tell you vets are not cheap. The journey picking her up was easy enough and that cat although obviously miserable was moving around. Then off to the vet, I sat in the back of the car the whole journey keeping an eye on Arri but we had to make our way to Sevenoaks, not a long journey by any means but time drags in these kinds of situations and a minuet feels like an hour. I cant claim to know anything about blood loss traumas but if T.V. and films have taught me anything its that you don't let something that's lost a lot of blood sleep. This of course might be the completely wrong thing to do in this case but I don't know that so every time I see his eyes close and his breathing slow down i would call his name out loud or knock the cage to keep him alert, it seems to work as he manages to stay awake for the whole journey. We pull up to the vets I jump out grabbing the cat cage and storm in to the vets, the receptionist knows exactly who we are and why where there and leads us to what I can only guess is emergency waiting room.
Like I wrote earlier it helps if you imagine me to be a 7 year old girl and all this time I have been fighting back the tears as I'm very much under the impression this cat will die in my arms. All I can think of are all the wonder full characteristics this cat has and it was killing me to think this was his last day on the planet. I f ever there was cat that lived for being stroked it was Arri, it was his purpose in life to find things that could and would stroke him, rubbing himself against any and all objects, on top of that he loved sleeping, but not like any cat I have ever known. He loved sleeping in some of the weirdest positions known to man, I can safely say that even the most talented practitioner of yoga could not recreate these moves, and he did them in his sleep. The vet finds us a few minuets later and leads us in to an assessment room. She is a pro quickly getting him out of the cage and assessing the injury to the leg, but these aren't her main concerns. The real issue maybe internal, especially if these injury's have been caused by a car.
Were informed that what other problems there maybe the cat will lose his leg, this cant be helped the damage is to bad. I suspected as much so this wasn't to much of a shock. Just as the doctor was about to leave I ask 'do you think my cat will make it?' She didn't want to give a straight answer, she knew that if there was to much internal damage there wasn't anything that could be done so she just reassured me and told me that she hoped so.
We left Arri cat with them to be put on a drip and given some pain meds, they would need to observe him over night then remove the leg the following day. We went home to clean up the blood and wait to hear what fate would become my cat. It was a terrible night, I hardly slept and felt awful throughout the night. I did text a friend or two seeking comfort but it was late and to be honest I doubt anything said would have cheered me up. So I went back to waiting.
As mourning came around we received a call of good news, there where no other injury's and the leg had been removed . On top of that they where happy with his progress and we would be getting him back soon. WHOOP WHOOP :)
My dad picked him up from the vets late Friday evening while he was there he was told that Arri had won an award for bravery, apparently he was good and calm the whole time he was there, then again I suppose its easy to be calm when drugged up on morphine, but hey who is complaining. So he is back with us now, he is trying to adjust to the lack of a limb, but cats adapt quickly and he is already moving about and sleeping in odd positions. I haven't been able to say anything on facebook or right this before as we didn't want my mum finding out while she was away on holiday, for obvious reasons we didn't feel it right to risk it.
I don't expect anyone to care about this to much, I mean Jesus Christ how many of you shed a tear about that recent plane crash that killed over a 100 people. Don't worry I'm not calling your heartless its just we've all desensitised to this type of tradegy. But if any of you have recently come in to a large sum of cash and want to help with the vet bills please let me know. Did I mention my cat can say 'i love you' on demand?
Monday 10 May 2010
Its not about the money, its about sending a message
Blog blog blog. Ummm blog blog, blog. These things are getting harder to do, although sadly existence for all things seem to have continued I find myself wondering what to write about. Luckily there has been an election. A time for all of us to have a say on who runs the country then an opportunity for 2/3Rd's of the country to be ignored. Whoop whoop that's politics baby. If we where smart we would have a two horse race like in America that way only 50% would feel let down.
I voted Lib Dem, I did this for a number of reasons, but mostly because i class myself as a liberal person. Being from Kent I have an irrational hatred of the French but I'm working on that and that's about as racist as i get. I'm not scared of gays and my views on drugs are well........ liberal. For the first time since records began I was under the impression that the Lib Dems had a real chance of victory I genuinly thought this. And I was happy, for the most part everyone I knew was happy. The idea that a vote for the Lib Dems was a wasted vote was gone. We could relax and just wait to vote, then we could experience some real change in our lives. This of course did not happen. This didn't happen because for some unknown reason when you got to the pooling station you panicked. YOU FUCKING COWARD. All those fears you once had about voting Lib Dem came back and you put a cross in the Torry box.
O the Tories. If ever there was a political party that was for the rich by the rich it was them. It may as well be called Toffs Anonymous. To this day the only people I know who vote them are either middle class or above and old people. Old fucking idiots that read bullshit right wing newspapers and live there lives in constant fear. They all sit around worried stupid that all there grand kids are being raped senseless by pedos. I'm sorry but the truth of the matter is child rapes are down, they have been on a constant decline since the 70's whats up though is the media coverage. Plus no offence but if you dress you 12 year old up like a hooker someone might offer her some money.
In all fairness my hatred of the Torry scum might come from being raised poor during the 80's, and a part of me knows that you cant get in to power any more with out reaching both the rich and the poor, but this does not change the fact that saying what poor people want to hear is not the same as having lived there lives. What ever, the people have spoken, the toffs are in lets see what happens over the next 4 years.
While on this subject now I'm not saying I will never vote Conservative as one day I might, they might change there policies to make me believe they are whats right for this country, but I find the idea unlikely. I am a strong believer that anyone who claims that they will always vote for one party, if it be Conservative, Labour or Lib Dems. I believe those people should not be allowed to vote. They simply just don't get the system, they don't understand how this works and how a party will change it views on subjects depending on the state of the country. I have met a number of these 'idiots' over the years. All of them claiming loyalty to a party as if it was a football club. Please don't become one of them, try to keep an open mind. But of course never vote BNP or National Front as that would make you worse then Hitler.
I voted Lib Dem, I did this for a number of reasons, but mostly because i class myself as a liberal person. Being from Kent I have an irrational hatred of the French but I'm working on that and that's about as racist as i get. I'm not scared of gays and my views on drugs are well........ liberal. For the first time since records began I was under the impression that the Lib Dems had a real chance of victory I genuinly thought this. And I was happy, for the most part everyone I knew was happy. The idea that a vote for the Lib Dems was a wasted vote was gone. We could relax and just wait to vote, then we could experience some real change in our lives. This of course did not happen. This didn't happen because for some unknown reason when you got to the pooling station you panicked. YOU FUCKING COWARD. All those fears you once had about voting Lib Dem came back and you put a cross in the Torry box.
O the Tories. If ever there was a political party that was for the rich by the rich it was them. It may as well be called Toffs Anonymous. To this day the only people I know who vote them are either middle class or above and old people. Old fucking idiots that read bullshit right wing newspapers and live there lives in constant fear. They all sit around worried stupid that all there grand kids are being raped senseless by pedos. I'm sorry but the truth of the matter is child rapes are down, they have been on a constant decline since the 70's whats up though is the media coverage. Plus no offence but if you dress you 12 year old up like a hooker someone might offer her some money.
In all fairness my hatred of the Torry scum might come from being raised poor during the 80's, and a part of me knows that you cant get in to power any more with out reaching both the rich and the poor, but this does not change the fact that saying what poor people want to hear is not the same as having lived there lives. What ever, the people have spoken, the toffs are in lets see what happens over the next 4 years.
While on this subject now I'm not saying I will never vote Conservative as one day I might, they might change there policies to make me believe they are whats right for this country, but I find the idea unlikely. I am a strong believer that anyone who claims that they will always vote for one party, if it be Conservative, Labour or Lib Dems. I believe those people should not be allowed to vote. They simply just don't get the system, they don't understand how this works and how a party will change it views on subjects depending on the state of the country. I have met a number of these 'idiots' over the years. All of them claiming loyalty to a party as if it was a football club. Please don't become one of them, try to keep an open mind. But of course never vote BNP or National Front as that would make you worse then Hitler.
Wednesday 5 May 2010
O such a pointless day
Every one is going to die.
Even the Highlander died and he was immortal. You should probably all get use to the idea that this will happen, that way when it does you wont do anything stupid like cry and call out for your mum. Two days ago I was so worried about my life ending that I created a file on my P.C. entitled 'In case The Worst Happens' it included a list of all my passwords to everything that I access online. This was so my parents in the case of my death could go online and close them all down. What brought on this fear, I was going to have my tonsils out.
I know it was just my tonsils nothing bad could happen plus almost everyone has already had them removed. There is no sound reason for me to be worried, except that is the warning on a leaflet given to me letting me know that i had a one in a million chance of death. O is that all? This does not sound to bad really until you take in to consideration that a) I'm one of the most unluckiest people on earth, everything that can go wrong usually does and b) the chances of winning the lottery are 1 in 14 million. For me that little statistic explains life perfectly. You have more chance of dying from a random accident then you do from being wealthy without really working for it. I was originally going to write that you have more chance dying from a random accident then you do from being happy. But its no guarantee that money will make you happy, it sure fucking helps of course.
So its 6 pm the day before I go to hospital I eat my last meal (a delicious chicken pasta salad) and start the long wait. Not sure why but as soon as you know you cant eat that when you get hungry but i held out, nothing past my lips except water. I lay in bed most the night absolutely bricking it. I should add that its not just the fear of death, I don't like hospitals anyway. In all honesty who the fuck does? They remind me of pain and death, sometimes my pain but to date not my death. I eventually doze off at about 3 am to wake up 4 hours later. I don't usually have breakfast but typically on this day all I can think about is getting some cereal, again I don't give in. Time slows to a crawl as I wait, T.V. and the Internet offer me no comfort. Its now quarter to eleven and my dad shouts time to go.
The car journey is quick and painless for the most part, but sadly my dad like most drivers on the planet believe the road should be just for them so i do have to deal with his muttering allot about other drivers going to slow or to quick. I honestly dream of a time when all cars are driven by robots but if the media has taught us anything its that A.I. devices will try to take over the world so maybe we can wait a little longer. Anyway on the way to Tunbridge Wells hospital we stop at my mums work place to pick up her stuff and i say goodbye. At the time it felt like the kind of goodbye soldiers said to there mums just before D-Day. We continue on to the hospital but dad wasn't to sure where to drop me off so he suggest I ask for guidance at the A&E department. Once I leave the car I realize this is a stupid idea and double back t the main entrance.
As I enter I use the hand cleaner, which as a side note is one of my movie flashbacks I have a couple, when ever i use those hand sanitizers i always picture myself as Joker in The Dark Knight. Another is when I'm pushing any type of trolley I always picture myself as the guy at the end of Raiders of the Lost Ark as he pushes the ark thought the warehouse. Anyway as I enter the building I'm greeted by the familiar smell of hospital, you know what I mean the smell of clean but not a nice clean. I see signs pointing me to the E.N.T. department (that's ears nose and throat to all you not in the know) I head down the corridor that never seems to end until I get to the right area. When I reach there I bump into an old work colleague from woolies we say hello and she explains that she is loosening her hearing. I shout OK and goodbye and then go to the front desk. I'm told almost instantly that I'm in the wrong place and i need to go back to the entrance then head upstairs. So back I head down the never ending corridor.
Level 6, visiting hours 3 till 5. I make a note of this as my mum said she will visit me when she finishes work. I bump into a nurse just a second after reading this info, she takes my name and point me towards the waiting room. The waiting room seems to be a judgement of how much your loved, including myself through out the time I'm in there , there are 3 guys on there own myself the youngest the others one about 40 and the third in his 60's. A few old couples, who have obviously been together for ever. One woman who seems to have brought her man, her sisters and all there partners along with them. A granny who is there with her daughter and grand daughter. Plus a middle aged couple. One by one all these people are lead out leaving myself the single guy in his 40's and one of the old couples, I find out that sadly these 3 have been here since 8 a.m. and its a little funny that everyone else will be seen before them this includes my self . But fuck em they should have gone private.
After an hour I get called out to speak with the anaesthetist, she looks through my notes and ask me what my doctor said about my high blood pressure, I respond by saying that I hadn't seen her about it. She ask why not? I explain that although i was told my blood pressure is high I was told that I should speak to my GP about it sometime in the future so I happily left it. This does not make the anaesthetist happy with me (from now on the anaesthetist will simply be called ANAES because I'm getting real fucking tired of writing it out). The anaes informs me they will have to test my blood pressure again and if its to high then I might not get the operation as it will be to risky at that time i wonder if that mean I would have a one in half a million chance of dying but i don't ask. She takes my blood pressure while she ask about my general health, no I don't smoke, no I don't drink often, yes I exercise. This seems to shock her, yes I exercise. I go for a mile long walk every day, every other day I lift weights. She does not believe me.
Her attitude about my weight changes with every sentence some times I'm to big boned other times I'm a little heavy and every now and again I'm dangerously over weight. She keeps coming back to the working out, like I'm going to change my story but I stick to it. For some reason she believes that 6 months of exercise should have magically fixed a life time of over eating. They test my blood pressure again and the anaes tells me its to risky to preform the op, she then tells me all the risk attached to having high blood pressure and that I'll die young from a mix of having a stroke, heart attack and my balls will fall off. Well not that last part but you get the drift. As i leave the hospital relived that I don't have to have the op I find myself genuinely unconcerned about this new issue, sure at the end of the day I was turned away from surgery for being to fat and yeah I feel like that kid at secondary school being picked on again because of my weight. But at that current moment I would rather be a fat guy walking away from hospital then a thin guy running the million to one risk of dying on the operating table.
This story should end here as its gone on for fucking ages but I feel I should also mention my music on my phone, I deleted most of it to put a few of the harry potter audio books on there so I would have something to listen to. Its only a small detail but it pissed me of greatly now that I have to sort that all out again. There is another few hundred little notes and changes I could make but I'll save those for future blogs. Anyway if you managed to read all of this with out getting bored hats of to you and I guess i hope you enjoyed. love you xoxoxoxo
Even the Highlander died and he was immortal. You should probably all get use to the idea that this will happen, that way when it does you wont do anything stupid like cry and call out for your mum. Two days ago I was so worried about my life ending that I created a file on my P.C. entitled 'In case The Worst Happens' it included a list of all my passwords to everything that I access online. This was so my parents in the case of my death could go online and close them all down. What brought on this fear, I was going to have my tonsils out.
I know it was just my tonsils nothing bad could happen plus almost everyone has already had them removed. There is no sound reason for me to be worried, except that is the warning on a leaflet given to me letting me know that i had a one in a million chance of death. O is that all? This does not sound to bad really until you take in to consideration that a) I'm one of the most unluckiest people on earth, everything that can go wrong usually does and b) the chances of winning the lottery are 1 in 14 million. For me that little statistic explains life perfectly. You have more chance of dying from a random accident then you do from being wealthy without really working for it. I was originally going to write that you have more chance dying from a random accident then you do from being happy. But its no guarantee that money will make you happy, it sure fucking helps of course.
So its 6 pm the day before I go to hospital I eat my last meal (a delicious chicken pasta salad) and start the long wait. Not sure why but as soon as you know you cant eat that when you get hungry but i held out, nothing past my lips except water. I lay in bed most the night absolutely bricking it. I should add that its not just the fear of death, I don't like hospitals anyway. In all honesty who the fuck does? They remind me of pain and death, sometimes my pain but to date not my death. I eventually doze off at about 3 am to wake up 4 hours later. I don't usually have breakfast but typically on this day all I can think about is getting some cereal, again I don't give in. Time slows to a crawl as I wait, T.V. and the Internet offer me no comfort. Its now quarter to eleven and my dad shouts time to go.
The car journey is quick and painless for the most part, but sadly my dad like most drivers on the planet believe the road should be just for them so i do have to deal with his muttering allot about other drivers going to slow or to quick. I honestly dream of a time when all cars are driven by robots but if the media has taught us anything its that A.I. devices will try to take over the world so maybe we can wait a little longer. Anyway on the way to Tunbridge Wells hospital we stop at my mums work place to pick up her stuff and i say goodbye. At the time it felt like the kind of goodbye soldiers said to there mums just before D-Day. We continue on to the hospital but dad wasn't to sure where to drop me off so he suggest I ask for guidance at the A&E department. Once I leave the car I realize this is a stupid idea and double back t the main entrance.
As I enter I use the hand cleaner, which as a side note is one of my movie flashbacks I have a couple, when ever i use those hand sanitizers i always picture myself as Joker in The Dark Knight. Another is when I'm pushing any type of trolley I always picture myself as the guy at the end of Raiders of the Lost Ark as he pushes the ark thought the warehouse. Anyway as I enter the building I'm greeted by the familiar smell of hospital, you know what I mean the smell of clean but not a nice clean. I see signs pointing me to the E.N.T. department (that's ears nose and throat to all you not in the know) I head down the corridor that never seems to end until I get to the right area. When I reach there I bump into an old work colleague from woolies we say hello and she explains that she is loosening her hearing. I shout OK and goodbye and then go to the front desk. I'm told almost instantly that I'm in the wrong place and i need to go back to the entrance then head upstairs. So back I head down the never ending corridor.
Level 6, visiting hours 3 till 5. I make a note of this as my mum said she will visit me when she finishes work. I bump into a nurse just a second after reading this info, she takes my name and point me towards the waiting room. The waiting room seems to be a judgement of how much your loved, including myself through out the time I'm in there , there are 3 guys on there own myself the youngest the others one about 40 and the third in his 60's. A few old couples, who have obviously been together for ever. One woman who seems to have brought her man, her sisters and all there partners along with them. A granny who is there with her daughter and grand daughter. Plus a middle aged couple. One by one all these people are lead out leaving myself the single guy in his 40's and one of the old couples, I find out that sadly these 3 have been here since 8 a.m. and its a little funny that everyone else will be seen before them this includes my self . But fuck em they should have gone private.
After an hour I get called out to speak with the anaesthetist, she looks through my notes and ask me what my doctor said about my high blood pressure, I respond by saying that I hadn't seen her about it. She ask why not? I explain that although i was told my blood pressure is high I was told that I should speak to my GP about it sometime in the future so I happily left it. This does not make the anaesthetist happy with me (from now on the anaesthetist will simply be called ANAES because I'm getting real fucking tired of writing it out). The anaes informs me they will have to test my blood pressure again and if its to high then I might not get the operation as it will be to risky at that time i wonder if that mean I would have a one in half a million chance of dying but i don't ask. She takes my blood pressure while she ask about my general health, no I don't smoke, no I don't drink often, yes I exercise. This seems to shock her, yes I exercise. I go for a mile long walk every day, every other day I lift weights. She does not believe me.
Her attitude about my weight changes with every sentence some times I'm to big boned other times I'm a little heavy and every now and again I'm dangerously over weight. She keeps coming back to the working out, like I'm going to change my story but I stick to it. For some reason she believes that 6 months of exercise should have magically fixed a life time of over eating. They test my blood pressure again and the anaes tells me its to risky to preform the op, she then tells me all the risk attached to having high blood pressure and that I'll die young from a mix of having a stroke, heart attack and my balls will fall off. Well not that last part but you get the drift. As i leave the hospital relived that I don't have to have the op I find myself genuinely unconcerned about this new issue, sure at the end of the day I was turned away from surgery for being to fat and yeah I feel like that kid at secondary school being picked on again because of my weight. But at that current moment I would rather be a fat guy walking away from hospital then a thin guy running the million to one risk of dying on the operating table.
This story should end here as its gone on for fucking ages but I feel I should also mention my music on my phone, I deleted most of it to put a few of the harry potter audio books on there so I would have something to listen to. Its only a small detail but it pissed me of greatly now that I have to sort that all out again. There is another few hundred little notes and changes I could make but I'll save those for future blogs. Anyway if you managed to read all of this with out getting bored hats of to you and I guess i hope you enjoyed. love you xoxoxoxo
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